Abolishing the Police in You

On restraining your inner cop.

It happens every few months. Almost as if on schedule.

A wiser man would simply not respond, but I often carry a foolish desire to engage with as many people as I have the capacity to. I believe that connection transforms us.

I am a public theologian. This means that some of my thoughts are shared with the world. Many of my musings become contributions to a discourse I am not in control of. And, because of the nature of social media, lots of people I do not have any relationship or connection with get to weigh in. Often, this leads to beautiful exchanges—even in disagreement.

But sometimes… it does not.

And these less beautiful exchanges always have one thing in common:

Complete strangers feel as though the assumptions they carry about me are valid foundations for engaging with me.

I would not consider myself a “people pleaser.” To be sure, I do consider myself relatively easy to enjoy. But I am not for everybody, and that is okay. I am a husband. A father. A son. A brother. A pastor. An employee. I am accountable to many people. But I am not (and cannot be) accountable to everyone. Some people will have to live with not liking me. I will have to live with some people not liking me. What most people think of me is none of my business. There is freedom to be found in this truth.

And many of us move through the world with a propensity of whittling away at that freedom.

So we must starve the cop inside of us.

---

The exchange typically begins with me offering a thought that I know will be received with some level of controversy. I do not say it for shock value. I say it because I believe that growth rarely happens in comfort. They are called “growing pains” for a reason.

Many people will read the things I say and quietly agree or disagree before they move on with their day. Some people will signal agreement or voice their appreciation for what they regard as food for thought. And some people will move to police me.

I am not above correction. I have been wrong before. Before all is said and done, I will be wrong again.

But there is a difference between correction and policing.

Correction is when you invite someone to correct an error. Policing is when you feel empowered to restrain someone.

And I am far too free to be policed by people I am not accountable to.

The exchange takes a turn when someone (who has deputized themself to police the world in matters of theology and/or respectability) decides to bring me in for questioning and realizes that they’ve encountered an uncooperative suspect. I resist arrest almost every time.

The police struggle to accept that I am unconcerned with the charges they lob in my direction. If my theology is not the problem (“can you back that up with scripture?”), then usually it’s my “tone.” I have not shown up with a degree of deference they deem acceptable. There was a time when people would just call me “uppity,” but that term has since fallen out of favor.

I usually tell the police that the safest thing to do is to leave me alone. They are out of jurisdiction, and their charges will not stick. I know my rights.

But police rarely like being told that they are powerless. It angers them.

And so each and every insecurity held by the police is projected onto me. More charges tacked on to an arrest they struggle to effect.

This is the point where I realize that this is bigger than me. The police are taking out their pent up frustrations on me, because they’ve determined that I am a worthy target. I am big enough to handle it and need to be brought down to size.

It’s usually around this point where I realize that there is at least a tiny policeman living inside of all of us. A voice that grows uncomfortable with the confidence of others. A patrolman waiting to cut someone else down to size so that we will feel less small. A warden that refuses to let others fulfill the freedom that God has called them to. And, in letting this overseer live in us rent-free, we become prisoners ourselves.

So we must starve the constable within us. If we are to find liberation, we must let others live into freedom. The cop we are harboring is standing between us and wholeness. It is only in restraining the officer that we can move toward that destination.

I am grateful for these semi-regular exchanges. They remind me that freedom is a commitment to resisting the police within each of us.

I like playing with words. So that’s what I do. Whether it be with tweets, videos, essays, sermonic presentations, Bible studies, podcasts, or speaking engagements of other sorts, I’m always trying to figure out how to provoke an image in a seeker with some combination of words.

If you’ve enjoyed any of the words I have to offer, check out my book Theologizin’ Bigger: Homilies on Living Freely and Loving Wholly wherever books are sold!